When Malia was born, Michelle and I were fortunate enough to spend a blissful three months mostly at home with our baby girl. But then Michelle went back to work part time, and I returned to my schedule of teaching at the University of Chicago law school and serving in the state legislature. This meant that I would often be away in Springfield for three days at a time. Even when I was home in Chicago, I had papers to grade and briefs to write and evening meetings to attend.

 

Things didn't get any easier when I was elected to the Senate and had to commute¹ back and forth² to Washington every week. Then our lives were thrown completely out of balance during a presidential campaign that kept me on the road almost constantly -- leaving Michelle to carry an even heavier load for longer stretches of time.

 

That's why I call her the rock of our family -- because she is. She always has been.

 

But to our surprise, moving to the White House was really the first time since the girls were born that we've been able to gather as a family almost every night. Michelle and I can go to parent-teacher conferences together. I've been able to make Malia's tennis matches and Sasha's dance recitals³. Sasha let me help coach her basketball team -- the Vipers⁴. They won the title. I've even experienced what all dads dread⁵: watching my daughter go to her first prom. In high heels.

 

So it's not always easy being a father of teenage girls. But it is pretty good to live above the store.

 

Even with our jam-packed days, Michelle and I work hard to carve out certain blocks of family time that are sacrosanct⁶. For example, at 6:30 p.m., no matter how busy I am, I leave work to go upstairs and have dinner with my family. That's inviolable. My staff knows that it pretty much takes a national emergency to keep me away from that dinner table. As a night owl⁷, I'd rather stay up late reading briefings and working on speeches after everybody has gone to bed anyway.

 

So for an hour or so at dinner, my focus is not on my day, but on theirs. I ask Sasha and Malia the usual annoying parental⁸ questions: How was school? What are your friends up to? Have you done your homework? What are you thinking about? In return, they spend a lot of time teasing me about my big ears or stodgy⁹ suits -- and Michelle is always happy to join them.

 

The highlight of my day is just listening to their thoughts about the world and seeing what smart, funny, kind young women they've become. That hour recharges me and gives me perspective. And those moments where I can just be Dad -- even if it's "Daaaaaaad" -- well, there's nothing better.

 

Michelle does her best to preserve that time, and it has made a huge difference. Like I said, she's our rock. Whatever comes up, I know that they'll be there for me. And I will always be there for them. These days, the girls occasionally miss a night because they're so busy with school and activities. And like many parents of high school juniors who are excitedly touring college campuses, I'm already dreading¹⁰ that empty seat at the table when Malia goes off to school next fall. I can feel myself lingering at the table a little longer, trying to stave off the passage of time. But for as long as possible, I'm going to enjoy every minute of finally having us all together under one roof.

 

First Lady Nancy Reagan once wrote, "Nothing can prepare you for living in the White House." She was right, of course. Nothing can prepare you. But your family can sustain you.

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