名师指点:如何写出中考英语高分作文
文章来源: 文章作者: 发布时间:2007-07-26 03:04 字体: [ ]  进入论坛
(单词翻译:双击或拖选)

 英语写作是学生学习的一个盲点,缺乏对写作的专门训练和反思,老师的工作量大,造成作文讲评大多数时候只谈现象,因此学生学得也不具体、不深入,忽略写作技能的提高,甚至误认为只要句子结构正确,无单词拼写错误就应该得满分。同学们应该走出对英语写作认识上的误区。那么怎样才能写出一篇优秀作文,而在中考中获取高分呢?
  一、写作决窍
  总体把握,要点齐全;人称时态,逻辑清楚;
  关键词汇,动词第一;组词成句,结构完整;
  组句成文,连词增色;此路不通,绕道迂回;
  字迹工整,留好印象;从句适量,高分有望。
  二、写作步骤
  1. 认真审题。审题包括要点、格式、词数以及此篇文章要传递给读者什么样的信息,告诫读者什么(即写作目的)。
  2. 确定文体和时态。确定文体后,根据不同文体的特点和要求进行组织材料;同时确定出该篇文章的总时态与时态的变化。
  3. 写完要点,但不随意发挥。
  4. 先草稿,后抄写。
  三、习作点评
  [2004年全国中学生英语能力竞赛初赛初三组] (14分)
  Choose one of your hobbies and write an article1 for the school magazine2 about it. Tell the magazine readers3.
  ﹒What exactly4 your hobby is;
  ﹒When and how you became5 interested7 in this hobby;
  ﹒Why you enjoy your hobby;
  ﹒About your hopes9 and plans11 for the future12.
  写作要求:
  1. 根据所提供的内容,适当拓展想象空间,灵活地将提供的信息体现在文章中。
  2. 条理清楚,语句通顺,书写清晰、规范。
  3. 词数60-80。
  [学生习作A]
  My hobby is read books. When I was13 seven years old .
  I became interested in reading16 books. I like needing books
  because there are a lot of useful17 things in books. I can learn
  a lot of knowledge18 from books. Books also can teach me
  how to be a good person19 . Books even15 can solve20 many
  problems21 for me . I will read more good books to improve22
  myself23.
  ①改为reading books,动词作表语时应该用动名词。
  ②also的位置应放在can之后。
  [点评]:档次9-11分。
  ①要点不全,漏掉最后一个要点。
  ②句子基本无误,能正确传递信息给读者但文章不流畅,句子与句子之间过渡不自然,给读者感觉在回答上述① ② ③问题。
  ③有少量错误。
  [学生习作B]
  My hobby is reading .Reading books is very enjoyable24 .
  When I was young ,my mother used25 to tell me a story before
  I went to bed every night .The stories were so interesting
  that I always felt they weren't enough . So I began to read
  books by myself .Little by little I became interested in
  reading . I can learn much knowledge and many interesting
  things all over the world .When I read books , I can enjoy the
  beautiful sentences26 . At the same time I can improve my
  writing27 . I want to be a writer28 in the future , so I must study
  hard and read more books so that my dream29 can come true30 .
  ①开门见山、点题。
  ②真情流露,理由充分。
  ③文中带圈的连词使用得恰当,使文章过渡自然、
  ④巧妙使用句型以表决心。
  [点评]:档次13-14分。
  ①清楚表达写作目的,要点齐全。
  ②语言表达灵活多样,字里行间流露出真情实感,文章有感染力。
  ③恰当使用连词和从句,语言流畅,且无错误,是一篇高质量的作文。
  [高分突破]
  ①文体:记叙文。
  ②要点:what → when →how → why → hope8 and plan10 for the future。
  ③时态:一般现在时,一般过去时,一般将来时的自然变化。
  内容具有开放性,但它也是“控制性”的写作试题,因此不能随意发挥,要善于抓信息,写完要点。选用这两篇学生真实习作,一是因为他们选材相同,二是因为他们都是英语成绩优秀的同学。同学B灵活使用连词so…that, so, little by little, when, so that等,恰到好处地使用新句型和短语used to, became interested in, come true……等,使内容丰富,读起来优美流畅。其实这些表达同学A也会,只是缺乏技术加工。通过这两篇作文点评,同学们便能悟出其中的奥妙。
  四、培养途径
  1. 根据老师布置的写作内容,独立完成一篇写作。
  2. 与同伴合作,交流自己的写作,通过交流找出各自作文中写得好的地方和优美的句子,合作创造一篇新的文章,供大家欣赏。
  3. 找老师点评,请求老师指点,尤其是怎样润色。
  4. 自己纠错,写下反思。
  五、备考演练
  A
  缙云山是重庆著名的游览胜地,每天有大量的游客。请你根据下面提供的信息写一篇报道,说明现在的游客在环境保护方面的变化。
  写作要求:
  1. 词数在100左右。
  2. 条理清楚,语句通顺。
  3. 开头已写好,但不计入总词数。
  Jinyun Mountain is a famous31 place of interest6
  B
  阅读电视广告词:“If we don’t save32 water , the last drop of water will be a tear-drop.”根据提示,写一篇60-80词的短文。
  提示:
  1. 生活离不开水。
  2. 可饮用水在减少。
  3. 水污染严重。
  4. 应保护水源,再利用水。?筝 思路点拨与参考答案 ?筝
  A. [思路点拨]:
  ①文体:记叙文。
  ②时态:一般过去时态,一般现在时态。采用正反对比的写作手法,增加感染力。
  ③写作目的:告诉读者保护环境的重要性。
  Jinyun Mountain is a famous place of interest . Every day a lot of tourists33 come here to enjoy its beauty34. But a few35 years ago,some of them paid36 no attention37 to protecting39 the environment40. They threw their rubbish41,such as14 plastic42 bags,fruit skins43 and waste44 paper on the ground45. Sometimes they broke46 trees,picked flowers and killed47 birds. Some even made48 fires in the woods to cook food. How dangerous it was. Luckily, great changes have taken place here. Tourists are used to putting their rubbish into dustbins49, and they are doing their best to protect38 the birds and plants as well. They bring their own50 meals51 instead52 of cooking53 to prevent54 starting a forest55 fire in the mountains. All these changes make us very happy.
  B. [思路点拨]:
  ①夹叙夹议(说明现状,谈谈感想)。
  ②时态:一般现在时态。
  ③广告词的含义——水很重要,应保护和再利用(写作意图)。
  Water is very important56 to humans57. We can’t live without water. The water we can drink is falling. But some people don’t seem58 to care59 about it. They waste a lot of water. They pour60 dirty water into rivers and lakes. Water pollution61 is getting more and more serious62. So we must do something to stop the pollution. We not only protect the water but also find ways to reuse63 it. If we don’t do this, the last drop of water will be a tear-drop.



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1 article Zvrz1     
n.文章,物品,条款;冠词
参考例句:
  • The article is very important.这篇文章很重要。
  • Can you translate this article for me?你能替我翻译这篇文章吗?
2 magazine KAyx1     
n.期刊,杂志
参考例句:
  • How much is this magazine?这本杂志多少钱?
  • I read a magazine in bed.我躺在床上看杂志。
3 readers 79eb01f6e54b59703e988be49808558f     
n.读者(复数);读者( reader的名词复数 );初级读物;电子阅读器;审稿人
参考例句:
  • The newspaper was mail-bombed by angry readers after the article was published. 文章发表后,这家报纸受到了愤怒读者的电邮轰炸。
  • We had a huge postbag on the subject from our readers. 我们收到了读者关于这个问题的大量来函。
4 exactly Xn7xG     
adv.准确地;严格地
参考例句:
  • What I want is exactly this one.我要的就是这一个。
  • I beg your pardon,what you say is not exactly correct.对不起,你说的话并不完全对。
5 became nQoyl     
v.(become的过去式)成为
参考例句:
  • He became a doctor at the age of 27.他27岁时成了一名医生。
  • He became a millionaire when he was still young.他还年轻时就成了百万富翁。
6 interest bRbzu     
v.引起…关注;使…感兴趣
参考例句:
  • She lost interest in him.她对他失去兴趣。
  • He developed an interest in science.他养成了对科学的兴趣。
7 interested WqFzGH     
adj.感兴趣的;拥有权益的;有成见的v.使…感兴趣(interest的过去分词)
参考例句:
  • to be interested in wildlife conservation 对野生动物保护感兴趣
  • I told him I wasn't interested, but he wasn't deterred. 我已告诉他我不感兴趣,可他却不罢休。
8 hope Kcwx9     
vt.希望,期望;vi.希望,期待;n.希望,期望
参考例句:
  • We hope you can come.我们希望你能来。
  • Hope you'll enjoy yourself there.愿您度过愉快的一天。
9 hopes 575d354f44532702b6e9ec2b9d600aef     
n.& v.希望n.希望( hope的名词复数 );希望的东西;被寄予希望的人(或事物、情况);抱有希望的理由v.希望,期望( hope的第三人称单数 );[俚语]相信,认为;希望,盼望,期待
参考例句:
  • He still hopes to win his claim against unfair dismissal . 他声称遭无理解雇,仍然希望赢得申诉。
  • a politician who embodied the hopes of black youth 代表黑人青年希望的政治家
10 plan UNOxW     
n.计划,策略,方法;v.计划,设计,意欲
参考例句:
  • What do you plan to do during the holidays?你打算在假期里做什么?
  • I talked with him about our plan,and he wanted in.我同他谈了我们的计划,他想参加。
11 plans 7d5291299ad348d03615a1d1577a7808     
n.计划( plan的名词复数 );打算;平面图;示意图v.计划,打算,设计( plan的第三人称单数 )
参考例句:
  • We have to discover his plans and act accordingly. 我们得找出他的计划,照着办。
  • There are plans afoot to increase taxation. 正在拟订增税方案。
12 future 9hhx1     
adj.将来的,未来的;n.将来,未来
参考例句:
  • We are still on the way of future.我们还在未来的路上。
  • We all work hard in the interests of our future.我们都为我们自己的将来而努力工作。
13 was bglwv     
v.(is,am的过去式)是,在
参考例句:
  • He said he was right.他说他是正确的。
  • He was cold and hungry.他又冷又饿。
14 as pNiyL     
conj.按照;如同
参考例句:
  • He got work in a hotel as a waiter.他在一家旅馆找到了当服务生的工作。
  • In the hotel,the old men were drinking away as usual.在旅馆里,这些老人和往常一样喝个不停。
15 even EiUzR     
adj.平坦的,偶数的,相等的;adv.甚至,恰好,正当
参考例句:
  • It was cold yesterday,but it's even colder today. 昨天冷,今天更冷了。
  • He's the best teacher even though he has the least experience.尽管他经验最少,但教得最好。
16 reading YiGyU     
n.阅读,知识,读物,表演,对法律条文的解释;adj.阅读的
参考例句:
  • Children learn reading and writing at school.孩子们在学校学习阅读和写作。
  • He finds pleasure in reading.他从阅读中得到乐趣。
17 useful QjHwV     
adj.有用的;有益的
参考例句:
  • The horse is a useful animal.马是有用的动物。
  • He's a useful member of the team.他是该队的一名强手。
18 knowledge o2Fxh     
n.知识,学识,学问;知晓,了解
参考例句:
  • He is poor in money, but rich in knowledge.他贫于金钱,但富于学问。
  • It is common knowledge that the earth is round.地球是圆的是常识。
19 person QMBxI     
n.人
参考例句:
  • I would never trust in that kind of person.我绝不会相信那种人。
  • She is the very person I wanted to see.她正是我要见的人。
20 solve Fwiw6     
v.解答(难题),解决;vt.解答,解决
参考例句:
  • I can solve the problem.我能解决这个问题。
  • This problem is too hard for me to solve.这个问题太难,我解决不了。
21 problems 8d8a1b73876ca678cc3afa372e5199de     
n.问题( problem的名词复数 );疑难问题;习题;思考题
参考例句:
  • It was an action replay of the problems of his first marriage. 这是他第一次婚姻问题的重演。
  • a few admin problems 一些行政问题
22 improve y9Bxg     
v.改良,改善,增进,提高
参考例句:
  • You need to improve your diet.你应该改善你的饮食。
  • I hope the weather will improve.我希望天气会变好。
23 myself fFSxG     
pron.我自己
参考例句:
  • Should I do it myself?我应该自己做吗?
  • I woke up to find myself in the hospital.我醒来发现自己在医院里。
24 enjoyable FpjxU     
adj.愉快的;有趣的
参考例句:
  • We had a most enjoyable evening.我们度过了一个非常愉快的夜晚。
  • We want to make your stay as enjoyable as possible.我们想尽量令你的逗留愉快。
25 used ajBwV     
adj.用旧了的,旧的;习惯于…;过去惯/经常
参考例句:
  • I used to work until nearly 6:00 o'clock each day.我过去常常工作到6:00左右。
  • He used to walk anywhere from two to five miles an hour.他过去经常一小时走二至五英里。
26 sentences 9cc49ff7cdca6cb5a0646f1e962943a4     
n.[律]判决,宣判,课刑;句子( sentence的名词复数 );宣判,判决v.宣判,判决( sentence的第三人称单数 )
参考例句:
  • Long prison sentences can be a very effective deterrent for offenders. 判处长期徒刑可对违法者起到强有力的威慑作用。
  • The example sentences in this dictionary are printed in italic type. 本词典中的例句都是用斜体排印的。
27 writing aeGzKN     
n.写,写作;著作,文学作品
参考例句:
  • I am also writing a short story.我也写短篇小说。
  • Do you like writing for children?你愿意为儿童写作吗?
28 writer Gf8wF     
n.作家,记者,撰稿者,抄写员
参考例句:
  • Dickens was a famous English writer.狄更斯是英国著名作家。
  • He is a very popular writer but I don't like his style.他是个很受欢迎的作家,但我不喜欢他的文风。
29 dream Yrvxv     
n.梦;梦想;v.做梦;向往
参考例句:
  • I remembered my grandfather in my dream last night.昨晚我梦见了我的外祖父。
  • It's my dream to win a Nobel Prize.我的理想是获得诺贝尔奖。
30 true nm2wH     
a.真实,不假的;忠实,可靠的;正确无误的
参考例句:
  • He who doesn't reach the Great Wall is not a true man.不到长城非好汉。
  • I will come and see if it is true.我要来了解一下,是否真有其事。
31 famous xloxC     
adj.著名的,驰名的,闻名遐迩的;极好的;擅长的
参考例句:
  • The hotel is famous for its suppers.那个酒店以晚餐而著称。
  • He is famous for his learning.他以有学问而出名。
32 save VZqxz     
n.救援,救球,节约;v.解救,保存,节省;prep.除...之外
参考例句:
  • Why didn't you save me?你为什么不救我?
  • We have to save old newspapers.我们得保存旧报纸。
33 tourists 113be7128a27c903ca8985165ac43225     
n.旅行者,观光客( tourist的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • For the more adventurous tourists, there are trips into the mountains with a local guide. 对更愿猎奇探险的旅游者,有本地向导带领进山游览。
  • tourists sunbathing on the beach 在海滩上沐浴着阳光的游客
34 beauty DumzT     
n.美;美景;美好的人或事物
参考例句:
  • We enjoyed the beauty of nature.我们欣赏大自然的美。
  • She was famous for her beauty.她以美丽而出名。
35 few kk0x2     
adj.很少的,不多的,少数的;int.少数的
参考例句:
  • There are few woods in that area.那个地区几乎没有森林。
  • I have a few questions.我有些问题要问你。
36 paid 7KYx6     
adj.有报酬的;领取报酬的;领钱的;付费的v.付给( pay的过去式);付款;有利可图;(对…)有利
参考例句:
  • You can be paid in cash weekly or by cheque monthly; those are the two alternatives. 你的工资可以按周以现金支取,或按月以支票支取。二者可选其一。
  • My salary is paid directly into my bank. 我的工资直接拨到我的银行。
37 attention tNtzA     
n.注意,注意力,关心,关注
参考例句:
  • I hope you will give attention to this problem.希望你对此给予关注。
  • Pay attention to your spelling.请注意拼写。
38 protect nRHxD     
vt.保护,投保;vi.提供保护
参考例句:
  • We protect you from danger.我们保护你不受危险。
  • An umbrella will protect you from the rain.雨伞可以保护你不至于淋雨。
39 protecting 539ea0278418a78f01defee8d63f1dd5     
v.保护( protect的现在分词 );防护;投保;关税保护
参考例句:
  • The secret service agents in charge of protecting the President tried to be as unobtrusive as possible. 负责保护总统的秘密安全人员的行动尽可能不引人注目。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • There was a low protecting wall to knock down the heat blasting from the pit of the furnace. 有一堵低矮的护壁挡住从炉膛里喷出的火焰。 来自《简明英汉词典》
40 environment Jozxa     
n.环境,生态环境,自然环境
参考例句:
  • It is much cheaper and kinder to the environment. 这样既便宜,又有益于保护环境。
  • We should protect the environment.我们应该保护环境。
41 rubbish 0XvxO     
n.垃圾,废物;废话,胡说八道
参考例句:
  • This book is all rubbish.这本书全是胡言乱语。
  • The room is full of rubbish.房间里堆满了垃圾。
42 plastic TO8xx     
n.塑料;adj.塑料的
参考例句:
  • This ruler is made of plastic.尺子是塑料做的。
  • Where is the plastic cup?塑料杯放哪儿了?
43 skins ada1fd05db818d2ce8b75dcbcfbc5efd     
n.皮(肤)( skin的名词复数 );(蔬菜,水果等)外皮;兽皮;外壳
参考例句:
  • These fruit knives are very good for stripping apple skins off. 这种水果刀削苹果皮很好用。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • Tangerines have skins that are easy to take off. 橘子的皮很容易剥掉。 来自《简明英汉词典》
44 waste 4MIzi     
v.浪费;滥用
参考例句:
  • Ah!This is a waste of time!啊,真是浪费时间!
  • If you give her money,she'll only waste it.如果你把这笔钱给她,她只会把它浪费掉。
45 ground 3fWxX     
n.土地,战场,场地;adj.土地的,地面上的;v.放在地上,使...搁浅,打基础
参考例句:
  • The baby is playing on the ground.婴儿正在地上玩。
  • He picked a pen from the ground.他从地上捡起一支钢笔。
46 broke gSUyi     
v.(动词break的过去式)折断;打破
参考例句:
  • He dropped his glass on the floor and broke it.他把玻璃杯掉到地板上打碎了。
  • After a long silence, she broke into a laugh.她沉默了很久之后,忽然笑了起来。
47 killed spCziP     
adj.被杀死的,断开的v.杀死( kill的过去式和过去分词 );使停止[结束,失败];破坏,减弱,抵消;使痛苦,使受折磨
参考例句:
  • The family was killed in an air raid. 这家人在一次空袭中遇难。
  • Two soldiers were killed in a terrorist ambush. 两名士兵遭到恐怖分子伏击而死亡。
48 made hAgx2     
v.make的过去式和过去分词
参考例句:
  • They were not made in china.它们不是中国制造的。
  • The monkey made a long arm for the peach.猴子伸臂去摘桃子。
49 dustbins 0d55f922a4032b0648dae5aecd39bcb1     
n.(家庭用的)垃圾箱[桶]( dustbin的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • The dustbins clashed as people emptied rubbish. 垃圾桶在人们倒垃圾时发出撞击声。 来自《简明英汉词典》
  • Dustbins are used for household waste. 垃圾箱是盛扔掉的破烂东西的。 来自互联网
50 own QKbxk     
v.拥有,持有;adj.(属于)自己的,特有的
参考例句:
  • I need my own space.我需要自己的空间。
  • Everything I own is yours.我所有的一切都是你的。
51 meals WoCzAW     
n.餐( meal的名词复数 );进餐时间;一餐所吃的食物;谷物粗粉(用作饲料或加工面粉)
参考例句:
  • Try not to eat between meals. 两餐之间尽量别吃东西。
  • tasty and nutritious meals 既可口又有营养的饭菜
52 instead c6uxQ     
adv.代替;顶替
参考例句:
  • She decided to leave here on Sunday instead of Monday.她决定星期日而不是星期一离开这里。
  • Will you go to the party instead of me?你替我赴宴好吗?
53 cooking uvuzkE     
n.烹调;烹饪
参考例句:
  • What do you mean,you don't like my cooking?你是什么意思,你是不喜欢我做的饭?
  • I have little knowledge of cooking.我几乎不懂烹饪技术。
54 prevent YQLxg     
v.预防,防止
参考例句:
  • Nobody can prevent our getting married.谁也阻止不了我们结婚。
  • My only idea was to prevent the woman from speaking.我唯一的想法就是不让那女人讲话。
55 forest zi4xk     
n.森林,园林,林火;vt.用树林覆盖,植树
参考例句:
  • A lion is the king of the forest.狮子是丛林之王。
  • I like reading in the forest.我喜欢在树林里读书。
56 important wcIzI     
adj.重要的;重大的;严重的
参考例句:
  • It's important to find out what he is doing.弄清他在干什么是重要的。
  • This is a very important problem.这个问题很重要。
57 humans cbf07d0fe08e4c48048f392118e682d8     
n.人,人类( human的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • Humans cannot digest plants such as grass. 人不能消化草类植物。
  • The bacteria are harmless to humans. 这些细菌对人无害。
58 seem 0ZpxR     
vi.好像,似乎,看来好像
参考例句:
  • You seem very much alive today.你今天好像非常活跃。
  • The children seem very happy.孩子们似乎很快活。
59 care FTYyC     
n.小心,照料,忧虑;v.关心,照顾,喜爱,介意
参考例句:
  • I really care about the students in my class.我的确喜欢这个班上的学生。
  • Her work is to take care of the children.她的工作是照料好孩子。
60 pour GBByb     
n.流出,倾泻,骤雨;v.倒,倾泻,蜂涌而来
参考例句:
  • This teapot doesn't pour well.这个茶壶不好倒。
  • Shall I pour you some tea?我给你斟点茶好吗?
61 pollution O1Bzx     
n.污染;污染物
参考例句:
  • Pollution is a big problem.污染是个大问题。
  • The new law will reduce pollution of the rivers.这条新法律将会减轻河流污染。
62 serious fECzy     
adj.认真的,严肃的,重大的,严重的
参考例句:
  • You know I am serious.你知道我是认真的。
  • He is a serious boy.他是个严肃的孩子。
63 reuse tjLzwI     
v.再使用;vt.重新使用
参考例句:
  • There are some ways to reuse the wastes.有很多废品再利用的方法。
  • The use and reuse of urban land.城市土地利用与再利用。
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