Letting Go of Yesterday
文章来源:未知 文章作者:enread 发布时间:2011-11-10 02:57 字体: [ ]  进入论坛
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On Saturday, February 12 two thousand, two things happened that changed everything in my life. The first was that on this day my baby sister was married. She was twenty-six this day, and yet to me she was still my baby sister. I suppose that I pictured her as a little girl, and treated her like one in order to hold onto and preserve my own youth. Until I saw her in her wedding dress I still had a vision of her with chubby1(圆胖的) little cheeks and long, dark-brown pigtails(辫子) blowing in the wind, perhaps even a permanent smudge(污点) of chocolate around her pink lips. I guess it's true that you see only what you want to see. Where did this beautiful woman with the glowing complexion2 and gentle curves come from?

I was happy that day, and also sad. Gone were the days of me bossing her around and telling her what she should do with her life. My bossy3 behavior had earned me the nickname4 Lucy. If you are a Peanuts fan then you can clearly imagine my behavior as an older sister. To me it wasn't an insult; I rather like the nickname Lucy. I happen to think that Lucy is strong and has incredible5 self-confidence, although she is a little overbearing at times. I did my best to live up to the standards set forth6 by this dynamic cartoon character.

I left the reception to get some air because suddenly I was overcome with grief7 at the realization8 that I was no longer a child. I went outside and walked to a nearby playground where there were children playing on the slide, the swings and digging in the dirt. There was a little girl twirling around on a bar, one knee wrapped tightly9 around the bar and fashioned behind her knee. It was all I could do to sit there and just watch, for I too wanted to get on that bar with her and see if I could still hold the all-time twirling record (ninety-nine times in fifth grade). Somewhere inside I knew that I would break my neck, and I was wearing a bridesmaid(伴娘) dress. Not exactly play ground material. And so I sat watching the children play. I'm not sure how long I sat there before my sister came and joined me. We talked about how we are grown up now and shed a few tears for our childhood days gone by. As she wiped a tear from my eye she lovingly said, "you'll always be Lucy to me." We hugged.

My cousin Mike walked over and told my sister that it was time to cut the cake. And then he dropped bomb number two on me. "Hey, did you guys hear that Charles Schultz died today?" He said it like it was no big deal. He took my sister's arm and turned to head back for the reception hall. "Coming?" They asked. "In a minute." I replied, and sat back down on the bench, dizzy from what he had just told me.

Dead? How could Charles Schultz be dead? He was my creator! And though I have never met the man personally, he has always been like an invisible father to me. He did, after all, fashion a famous character after me. I lost so many things on this day. Innocence10 slipped away from me like a thief in the night: come and gone before I could do anything about it, taking with it all the treasures that I held most valuable in my heart. I felt myself grow up, all in one moment. Reality rushed in around me like a hurricane tide. There was nowhere to run to. All I could do was sit there and watch it destroy and reshape what had existed only a moment before. I was no longer a child. I was no longer Lucy who knew what was best for everyone else. I saw, for the first time, what I really was—a thirty-year old woman with a husband of my own, and soon, a child of my own.

I allowed the tide to carry my sadness out with it. Take it out to sea, for it serves no purpose in my life. I stood up from the bench; a little taller than I was when I sat down. I turned and headed back to the hall, hoping I didn't miss the cutting of the cake. It was the day my sister grew wings of her own and left the nest. It was the day that Lucy died, and I was born.



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1 chubby wrwzZ     
adj.丰满的,圆胖的
参考例句:
  • He is stocky though not chubby.他长得敦实,可并不发胖。
  • The short and chubby gentleman over there is our new director.那个既矮又胖的绅士是我们的新主任。
2 complexion IOsz4     
n.肤色;情况,局面;气质,性格
参考例句:
  • Red does not suit with her complexion.红色与她的肤色不协调。
  • Her resignation puts a different complexion on things.她一辞职局面就全变了。
3 bossy sxdzgz     
adj.爱发号施令的,作威作福的
参考例句:
  • She turned me off with her bossy manner.她态度专橫很讨我嫌。
  • She moved out because her mother-in-law is too bossy.她的婆婆爱指使人,所以她搬出去住了。
4 nickname aGuxJ     
n.绰号,昵称;v.给...取绰号,叫错名字
参考例句:
  • She called me by my nickname.她叫我的外号。
  • Why do you fasten such a nickname on her?你为什么给她取这样一个绰号?
5 incredible q8fx7     
adj.难以置信的,不可信的,极好的,大量的
参考例句:
  • Some planets run at incredible speed.某些星球以难以置信的速度运行着。
  • Her answer showed the most incredible stupidity.她的回答显示出不可思议的愚蠢。
6 forth Hzdz2     
adv.向前;向外,往外
参考例句:
  • The wind moved the trees gently back and forth.风吹得树轻轻地来回摇晃。
  • He gave forth a series of works in rapid succession.他很快连续发表了一系列的作品。
7 grief DfHxP     
n.悲伤,悲痛,悲伤的事,悲痛的缘由
参考例句:
  • Don't allow yourself to sink into grief,it can do no good.不要使自己陷入悲哀之中,这样一点好处也没有。
  • After her mother died,she abandoned herself to grief.母亲死后,她沉浸于悲痛之中。
8 realization nTwxS     
n.实现;认识到,深刻了解
参考例句:
  • We shall gladly lend every effort in our power toward its realization.我们将乐意为它的实现而竭尽全力。
  • He came to the realization that he would never make a good teacher.他逐渐认识到自己永远不会成为好老师。
9 tightly ZgbzD7     
adv.紧紧地,坚固地,牢固地
参考例句:
  • My child holds onto my hand tightly while we cross the street.横穿马路时,孩子紧拉着我的手不放。
  • The crowd pressed together so tightly that we could hardly breathe.人群挤在一起,我们几乎喘不过气来。
10 innocence ZbizC     
n.无罪;天真;无害
参考例句:
  • There was a touching air of innocence about the boy.这个男孩有一种令人感动的天真神情。
  • The accused man proved his innocence of the crime.被告人经证实无罪。
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