如何变得魅力四射
文章来源:未知 文章作者:enread 发布时间:2021-02-23 08:39 字体: [ ]  进入论坛
(单词翻译:双击或拖选)
为什么有的人招人喜欢,人见人爱?为什么有的人不管走到哪里都可以广交朋友?
 
Life isn't fair. Some people just seem blessed with the ability to effortlessly charm anyone they meet. You know the kind of person, the one who can strike up a conversation with a complete stranger and end up with a new friend or business lead. How do they do it?
 
Well, it might seem like a magical power, but in fact there are a number of factors at work. So, can you learn to develop superhuman charm? The answer is: to a large extent, yes you can.
 
But first, the bad news. Scientists have found that people initially1 judge each other based purely2 on physical appearance. With just a fleeting3 glimpse of a face, people make snap judgements about each other's likeability, trustworthiness and confidence, according to Alexander Todorov, professor of psychology4 at Princeton University.
 
How to counteract5 this? There's one incredibly simple tool: your smile. Todorov told the BBC that people perceive a smiling face as "more trustworthy, warmer and sociable6". It sounds like common sense, doesn't it? Smile and others will smile with you.
 
What other tricks might we have up our sleeves? Former FBI agent Jack7 Schafer has been trained in how to influence people. He told BBC Capital: "Our brains are always surveying the environment for friend or foe8 signals." Three things we can do to signal that we are not a threat are to: raise our eyebrows9 quickly, tilt10 our heads slightly, and, once again, to smile.
 
So we've looked at body language, but of course what you say is hugely important too, unless you want to just stand there grinning foolishly. Here Schafer recommends that "the golden rule of friendship is if you make people feel good about themselves, they're going to like you." In other words, you need to show interest in them, instead of talking about yourself and all your wonderful achievements. And while you're chatting, remember this: another way of showing interest is to mirror their physical position.
 
Another way to form a connection? Find common ground. Suzanne de Janasz, a professor of management with Seattle University, says that charming people are particularly adept11 at seeking out shared interests or experiences to help them build rapport12. Simple things like asking where someone's from really can open up a discussion and allow you to find areas in common. And if all else fails, you can fall back on that most British of topics: the weather. Glorious day, isn't it?


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1 initially 273xZ     
adv.最初,开始
参考例句:
  • The ban was initially opposed by the US.这一禁令首先遭到美国的反对。
  • Feathers initially developed from insect scales.羽毛最初由昆虫的翅瓣演化而来。
2 purely 8Sqxf     
adv.纯粹地,完全地
参考例句:
  • I helped him purely and simply out of friendship.我帮他纯粹是出于友情。
  • This disproves the theory that children are purely imitative.这证明认为儿童只会单纯地模仿的理论是站不住脚的。
3 fleeting k7zyS     
adj.短暂的,飞逝的
参考例句:
  • The girls caught only a fleeting glimpse of the driver.女孩们只匆匆瞥了一眼司机。
  • Knowing the life fleeting,she set herself to enjoy if as best as she could.她知道这种日子转瞬即逝,于是让自已尽情地享受。
4 psychology U0Wze     
n.心理,心理学,心理状态
参考例句:
  • She has a background in child psychology.她受过儿童心理学的教育。
  • He studied philosophy and psychology at Cambridge.他在剑桥大学学习哲学和心理学。
5 counteract vzlxb     
vt.对…起反作用,对抗,抵消
参考例句:
  • The doctor gave him some medicine to counteract the effect of the poison.医生给他些药解毒。
  • Our work calls for mutual support.We shouldn't counteract each other's efforts.工作要互相支持,不要互相拆台。
6 sociable hw3wu     
adj.好交际的,友好的,合群的
参考例句:
  • Roger is a very sociable person.罗杰是个非常好交际的人。
  • Some children have more sociable personalities than others.有些孩子比其他孩子更善于交际。
7 jack 53Hxp     
n.插座,千斤顶,男人;v.抬起,提醒,扛举;n.(Jake)杰克
参考例句:
  • I am looking for the headphone jack.我正在找寻头戴式耳机插孔。
  • He lifted the car with a jack to change the flat tyre.他用千斤顶把车顶起来换下瘪轮胎。
8 foe ygczK     
n.敌人,仇敌
参考例句:
  • He knew that Karl could be an implacable foe.他明白卡尔可能会成为他的死敌。
  • A friend is a friend;a foe is a foe;one must be clearly distinguished from the other.敌是敌,友是友,必须分清界限。
9 eyebrows a0e6fb1330e9cfecfd1c7a4d00030ed5     
眉毛( eyebrow的名词复数 )
参考例句:
  • Eyebrows stop sweat from coming down into the eyes. 眉毛挡住汗水使其不能流进眼睛。
  • His eyebrows project noticeably. 他的眉毛特别突出。
10 tilt aG3y0     
v.(使)倾侧;(使)倾斜;n.倾侧;倾斜
参考例句:
  • She wore her hat at a tilt over her left eye.她歪戴着帽子遮住左眼。
  • The table is at a slight tilt.这张桌子没放平,有点儿歪.
11 adept EJIyO     
adj.老练的,精通的
参考例句:
  • When it comes to photography,I'm not an adept.要说照相,我不是内行。
  • He was highly adept at avoiding trouble.他十分善于避开麻烦。
12 rapport EAFzg     
n.和睦,意见一致
参考例句:
  • She has an excellent rapport with her staff.她跟她职员的关系非常融洽。
  • We developed a high degree of trust and a considerable personal rapport.我们发展了高度的互相信任和不错的私人融洽关系。
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TAG标签: People interest charm
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