我的座右铭：生活半对半

　　　　　　　　　　The 50-Percent Theory of Life 

I believe in the 50-percent theory. Half the time things are better than normal; the other half, they are worse. I believe life is a pendulum¹ swing. It takes time and experience to understand what normal is, and that gives me the perspective to deal with the surprises of the future. 

Let's benchmark the parameters²: Yes, I will die. I've dealt with the deaths of both parents, a best friend, a beloved boss and cherished pets. Some of these deaths have been violent, before my eyes, or slow and agonizing³. Bad stuff, and it belongs at the bottom of the scale. 

Then there are those high points: romance and marriage to the right person; having a child and doing those Dad things like coaching my son's baseball team, paddling around the creek⁴ in the boat while he's swimming with the dogs, discovering his compassion⁵ so deep it manifests even in his kindness to snails⁶, his imagination so vivid he builds a spaceship from a scattered⁷ pile of Legos. 

But there is a vast meadow of life in the middle, where the bad and the good flip-flop acrobatically. This is what convinces me to believe in the 50-percent theory. 

One spring I planted corn too early in a bottomland so flood-prone that neighbors laughed. I felt chagrined⁸ at the wasted effort. Summer turned brutal⁹ -- the worst heat wave and drought in my lifetime. The air-conditioner died, the well went dry, the marriage ended, the job lost, the money gone. I was living lyrics¹⁰ from a country tune¹¹ -- music I loathed¹². Only a surging Kansas City Royals team, bound for their first World Series, buoyed¹³ my spirits. 

Looking back on that horrible summer, I soon understood that all succeeding good things merely offset¹⁴ the bad. Worse than normal wouldn't last long. I am owed and savor¹⁵ the halcyon¹⁶ times. They reinvigorate me for the next nasty surprise and offer assurance that I can thrive. The 50 percent theory even helps me see hope beyond my Royals' recent slump¹⁷, a field of struggling rookies sown so that some year soon we can reap an October harvest. 

Oh, yeah, the corn crop? For that one blistering¹⁸ summer, the ground moisture was just right, planting early allowed pollination¹⁹ before heat withered²⁰ the tops, and the lack of rain spared the standing²¹ corn from floods. That winter my crib overflowed²² with corn -- fat, healthy three-to-a-stalk ears filled with kernels²³ from heel to tip -- while my neighbors' fields yielded only brown, empty husks. 

Although plantings past may have fallen below the 50-percent expectation, and they probably will again in the future, I am still sustained by the crop that flourishes during the drought. 

　　中文：

　　我信奉对半理论。生活时而无比顺畅，时而倒霉透顶，好坏参半。我觉得生活就像来回晃动的钟摆。读懂生活的常态需要时间和阅历，也正是这样才练就了我面对未来荣辱不惊的生活态度。 

　　让我们掂量这些点点滴滴：是的，我注定会死去。我已经经历了双亲的仙逝，一位友人的亡故，一位敬爱的老板的离逝，还有心爱宠物的死亡。当中一些变故突如其来，直击眼前；有些却长期折磨，痛苦不堪。糟糕的事儿，它们驻留谷底。

　　当然生活也不乏熠熠光彩：坠入爱河缔结良缘；养育幼子身为人父，训练儿子的棒球队，当他和狗在水中嬉戏时，摇桨划船前瞻后顾，感受他如此强烈的同情心——即使对蜗牛也善待有加，发现他如此活跃的想像力——即使零散的积木也能堆出太空飞船。

　　但在它们发生期间有一片宽广的草坪，在那儿上演的各种好事坏事像耍杂技一样地翻新。这就是让我信服对半理论的原因。

　　有一年春天，我在一片容易被淹的低洼地过早地种下了玉米，邻居们都为此嘲笑我。一番心血付之东流让我懊恼不已。接着我生命中最难熬的酷暑来临了——热浪袭人，酿至旱灾。空调失灵，水井枯竭，婚姻破裂，惨遭失业，积蓄挥空。我正经历某个乡村调频描绘的情节，我讨厌这种音乐。只有一支人气攀升的堪萨斯皇家棒球队的小组因他们的第一次出征世界大赛团结起来使我精神振奋。

　　回想那个可怕的夏天，我不久就明白了所有的好事坏事不过是正负抵消。不顺心的境遇不会延宕过久。太平时光是我应得的，我要尽情享受。它们给我新的活力以应对突如其来的险境，并确保我再度辉煌。对半理论甚至帮我在我喜爱的皇家棒球队最近的低潮中看到希望——这是一块艰难行进的新手们耕耘的土地，播种了，假以时日我们就可以收获十月的金秋。

　　哦，对了，玉米收成？就那年炎热的夏天，庄稼地的湿度恰到好处，过早的种植使授粉避开酷热在顶梢干枯前完成，雨水稀少使地里长着的玉米免遭水灾。那年冬天，我的粮仓里堆满了玉米——饱满结实的玉米每株秆上结三个，每个玉米从底到顶端长满了玉米粒——而我的邻居们地里长出来的只是暗沉干瘪的壳。

　　尽管过去播种的收获没有达到50％的期望，而且将来也可能是这样，我仍然要为经历旱季依然丰收的玉米而坚守阵地。