GRE写作讲义(五)-习作评改4b
文章来源: 文章作者: 发布时间:2008-07-29 05:57 字体: [ ]  进入论坛
(单词翻译:双击或拖选)
Original: Modern people receive vast news and information of many kinds every day and are so overwhelmed by these factual news that they are not think much about larger issues or from overall perspectives.
Revised: Modern people are therefore overwhelmed with small pieces of factual information to the extent that they think little about the larger issues and fail to look at issues from an overall perspective.
 
Original: With the help of modern technologies, researchers get new findings and facts in all kinds of fields everyday, and through these facts and information most subjects and disciplines have gotten more and more specialized1.
Revised: Modern technology’s facilitation of discoveries of little bits of information in many fields also contributes to the problem of obscuring the larger perspective.
 
Original: In addition, in people’s daily life, they have accustomed to being surrounded by news and information disseminated2 through global mass media.
Revised: The dissemination3 of information through the global mass media, especially through television, likewise habituates people to getting information in small bites and not thinking about the bigger picture.
 
Original: For example, during the World War II, the American government carries out the famous Manhattan plan to develop the nuke.
For example, during World War II, the American government carried out the infamous4 Manhattan Project to develop the nuclear bomb.
 
Original: If the Manhattan would successfully develop the nuke, the battle effectiveness of the American’s military should be reinforce and take the advantages in the World War II.
If the Manhattan Project could successfully develop nuclear weapons, America’s military effectiveness could be reinforced and take on a strong advantage in the war effort.
 
Original: But sometimes the result of a research can cause much controversy5 in society.
Revised: But sometimes the result of research can stir up social controversy.
 
However, there are reasons to leave schools some margin6 in determining curriculum.
Revised: There are several reasons, however, to leave schools some leeway in determining curriculum.
 
Original: How we can clearly understand contemporary culture while culture is a so intricate notion that includes a wide varieties of idea and is usually disgusted by many confusing phenomena7?
Revised: How can we clearly understand contemporary culture, when culture is such an intricate notion, which encompasses8 a wide variety of ideas and which may be obscured by confusing external signals?
 
Original: A young man has an air of freedom and is keener to new things and fresh ideas than the old.
Revised: A young person has a freer spirit and is more receptive to new things and fresh ideas than an old person.
 
Original: So the youth are always more perspicacious9 than and usually closely catch up with the pace of development of a society or sometimes even lead current of social progress.
Revised: So young people are more perceptive10, and their lives usually march with the pace of development of a society.
 
Original: Moreover, it is easier to acquire messages of a culture from the young than from the old.
Revised: Moreover, it is easier to discern cultural trends by focusing on the young than by observing the old.
 
Original: Because a young man usually is more open-minded and has less restriction11 in practicing their own believes:
Revised: Young people are usually more open-minded and less inhibited12 about expressing their beliefs:
 
Original: One thing under the same situation, two person will give you disparage13 descriptions, for they are from different angles and have different perspectives.
Revised: Two people, finding themselves in the same situation, will describe it in different ways, for they look at the circumstances from alternative angles and have disparate perspectives.


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1 specialized Chuzwe     
adj.专门的,专业化的
参考例句:
  • There are many specialized agencies in the United Nations.联合国有许多专门机构。
  • These tools are very specialized.这些是专用工具。
2 disseminated c76621f548f3088ff302305f50de1f16     
散布,传播( disseminate的过去式和过去分词 )
参考例句:
  • Their findings have been widely disseminated . 他们的研究成果已经广为传播。
  • Berkovitz had contracted polio after ingesting a vaccine disseminated under federal supervision. 伯考维茨在接种了在联邦监督下分发的牛痘疫苗后传染上脊髓灰质炎。
3 dissemination dissemination     
传播,宣传,传染(病毒)
参考例句:
  • The dissemination of error does people great harm. 谬种流传,误人不浅。
  • He was fully bent upon the dissemination of Chinese culture all over the world. 他一心致力于向全世界传播中国文化。
4 infamous K7ax3     
adj.声名狼藉的,臭名昭著的,邪恶的
参考例句:
  • He was infamous for his anti-feminist attitudes.他因反对女性主义而声名狼藉。
  • I was shocked by her infamous behaviour.她的无耻行径令我震惊。
5 controversy 6Z9y0     
n.争论,辩论,争吵
参考例句:
  • That is a fact beyond controversy.那是一个无可争论的事实。
  • We ran the risk of becoming the butt of every controversy.我们要冒使自己在所有的纷争中都成为众矢之的的风险。
6 margin 67Mzp     
n.页边空白;差额;余地,余裕;边,边缘
参考例句:
  • We allowed a margin of 20 minutes in catching the train.我们有20分钟的余地赶火车。
  • The village is situated at the margin of a forest.村子位于森林的边缘。
7 phenomena 8N9xp     
n.现象
参考例句:
  • Ade couldn't relate the phenomena with any theory he knew.艾德无法用他所知道的任何理论来解释这种现象。
  • The object of these experiments was to find the connection,if any,between the two phenomena.这些实验的目的就是探索这两种现象之间的联系,如果存在着任何联系的话。
8 encompasses cba8673f835839b92e7b81ba5bccacfb     
v.围绕( encompass的第三人称单数 );包围;包含;包括
参考例句:
  • The job encompasses a wide range of responsibilities. 这项工作涉及的职责范围很广。
  • Its conservation law encompasses both its magnitude and its direction. 它的守恒定律包括大小和方向两方面。 来自辞典例句
9 perspicacious zM9xO     
adj.聪颖的,敏锐的
参考例句:
  • It is very perspicacious of you to find the cause of the trouble so quickly.你真是明察秋毫,问题的原因这么快就找出来了。
  • He's an impartial and perspicacious judge.这位法官明镜高悬。
10 perceptive muuyq     
adj.知觉的,有洞察力的,感知的
参考例句:
  • This is a very perceptive assessment of the situation.这是一个对该情况的极富洞察力的评价。
  • He is very perceptive and nothing can be hidden from him.他耳聪目明,什么事都很难瞒住他。
11 restriction jW8x0     
n.限制,约束
参考例句:
  • The park is open to the public without restriction.这个公园对公众开放,没有任何限制。
  • The 30 mph speed restriction applies in all built-up areas.每小时限速30英里适用于所有建筑物聚集区。
12 inhibited Fqvz0I     
a.拘谨的,拘束的
参考例句:
  • Boys are often more inhibited than girls about discussing their problems. 男孩子往往不如女孩子敢于谈论自己的问题。
  • Having been laughed at for his lameness,the boy became shy and inhibited. 那男孩因跛脚被人讥笑,变得羞怯而压抑。
13 disparage nldzJ     
v.贬抑,轻蔑
参考例句:
  • Your behaviour will disparage the whole family.你的行为将使全家丢脸。
  • Never disparage yourself or minimize your strength or power.不要贬低你自己或降低你的力量或能力。
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